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Books on Navigating Family Dynamics This Holiday Season

As you head home for the holidays, consider these books that explore family dynamics and how to foster intimacy.

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THE SIBLING EFFECT
What the Bonds Among Brothers and Sisters Reveal About Us
By Jeffrey Kluger
308 pp. Riverhead Books. (2011)

Ever wonder why your eldest sibling is smarter, or your younger more carefree? Kluger melds memoir with science to deliver a book that gives both anecdotal and data-based proof of the significance of sibling order. He argues that older siblings are more likely to succeed and have a three-point edge in I.Q., while younger brothers and sisters are more intuitive; readers also learn that as children, brothers and sisters fight once every 17 minutes, that only children get exposed to the adult world and abstract constructs at an earlier age, as well as the degree to which divorce and favoritism in parenting affect children. Read our original review, written by a brother and sister pair.

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TOGETHER, CLOSER
The Art and Science of Intimacy in Friendship, Love and Family
By Giovanni Frazzetto
208 pp. Penguin Books. (2017)

In his prologue, Frazzetto writes, “We live in a world where it is much easier to find isolation than companionship. Yet meaningful relationships are the most nurturing ingredient for our happiness.” The molecular biologist uses psychology, neurology and biological information to explore the ways in which intimacy manifests in different types of relationships. He recounts the stories of eight relationships, from romantic — such as Ryan and Vanessa, who have been having an affair for years — to the familial or personal. Oscar, for instance, must contend with what it means to be close to death, while Anita invents a fake boyfriend to help her cope with her loneliness. Each story puts intimacy and how we experience it on display.

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THE LAY OF THE LAND
By Richard Ford
485 pp. Knopf. (2006)

This is the third installment in Ford’s Frank Bascombe series, about an Everyman who lives in a suburb of New Jersey. It is set during Thanksgiving week at the beginning of the millennium, and covers three days in the protagonist’s life. His wife has left him for her first husband, and at 55, he is being treated for prostate cancer. The book is full of ruminations on mortality and aging; Frank’s failed marriage surfaces issues with self-doubt, and he spends much time reflecting on what he hasn’t done, like learn German or sleep with a movie star. This internal reckoning occurs against the backdrop of the upcoming holiday.

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